As a child, I remember a poem hanging above the washing machine in our basement. I always found it curious that this hung on the cinder block wall in the darkened corner, keeping company with a few spiders. It seemed a strange place until years later as I stood folding my own family’s laundry that I realized how much time was spent in front of the washer and dryer. The poem wasn’t hung there by chance, but as a very intentional reminder. I wonder how many times my mother read that poem as she folded shirts, hung dresses, and matched socks…and how many times I was the beneficiary.
The poem is titled, “Children Learn What They Live,” by Dorothy Law Nolte.
Children Learn What They Live
If children live with criticism,
They learn to condemn.
If children live with hostility,
They learn to fight.
If children live with ridicule,
They learn to be shy.
If children live with shame,
They learn to feel guilty.
If children live with tolerance,
They learn to be patient.
If children live with encouragement,
They learn confidence.
If children live with praise,
They learn to appreciate.
If children live with fairness,
They learn justice.
If children live with security,
They learn to have faith.
If children live with approval,
They learn to like themselves.
If children live with acceptance and friendship,
They learn to find love in the world.
So, I ask the question…
…what is your child living?
…what is your child learning?
Young children are like sponges, just soaking up all that is around them - be the example that you want for your child! Are they surrounded by love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control? These nine qualities are the reflection of the character of God and the work of the Holy Spirit in our lives. (Galatians 5:22-23)
Are you striving for these and demonstrating for your child how to be kind? How to make good choices? How to take care of others? How to be patient? How to put others first?
Last Sunday at church, 2 teenage brothers came into the Sanctuary shortly after me. I watched as they greeted the usher handing out the bulletins. Aware that another person was behind them and realizing she had just given them the last of the bulletins, the boys turned around, greeted the gentleman, and handed him one of the bulletins they had just been given. In this simple act, they demonstrated initiative, an awareness of others, respect, kindness, and caring - all without any prompting from an adult - and with the understanding that they would now have to share with each other (as a teenager, having to share with your sibling? - ugh!) I couldn’t help but think how proud their parents would have been if they had witnessed this interaction. There is no question what is surrounding these boys, what they are living and in turn, what they are learning.
As the adults in our children’s lives, we need to be sure, in word and deed, that we are being the people we want our children to emulate. And reminders are always a good thing – even if it is through a poem read while trying to conquer the pile of dirty clothes!
Children really do learn what they live!
To God be the Glory!
Kristin Coco
